Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Shooting Rainbows Out of my Mouth

I got back from a long weekend trip to visit my parents in Las Vegas.  Technically, they live in Henderson, Nevada which is just south of Vegas.  But more on that in a later post.

This post is about my colorful language.  I can speak in colors that haven't even been created yet.  This phenomenon is brought on by water bugs.  This particular episode, which happened last night, was brought on by a water bug hiding in my shower towel.  However, I didn't know it was hiding until I grabbed for the towel after I had finished my shower.

Let me set the scene for you ...

Exhausted from traveling most of the day.  Check.  Hot and sexy me.  Check.  Hot and steamy shower.  Check.  Evil, lurking water bug nestled inside the hanging bathroom towel.  Check.  Me reaching for said towel and said evil, lurking water bug goes flying into my shower with me.  OH. GOD. CHECK.

The next actions happened in a flash.  Seriously.  I think I could have out run the Flash as I dashed out of my shower, slipping on the tiled floor, bathroom towel flung across the bathroom, and magical rainbows spewing from my heavenly lips.

Heavenly Lips = Snarling, Curled Lips with Gnashing of Teeth

Thankfully, the water bug is now in bug hell (there is no bug heaven).  I also let it die a slow and painful death thanks to Raid (I don't care if PETA thinks it is cruel ... they can hug all the water bugs they want).  My colorful, rainbow induced language also spiked my adrenaline.  Before this event I was all ready to go to bed and enjoy a great night's rest.  BUT NOOOOOO!  I had to drink a few glasses of wine, spray my baseboards with Raid and shout a few words from the crayon box.  If there were pots of gold at the end of rainbows I'd be one rich drama queen right about now.

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